Another NFL draft has come and gone. Sure, we all have our favorite squads, unless you’re Burrier, who seems to like about a third of the teams throughout the league. Yet, what impact does this have on fantasy? That’s what we really want to know. Today, let’s look at the running backs.

FOUR ROOKIE RUNNING BACKS TO WATCH

EZEKIEL ELLIOT – COWBOYS If I were to jump up into the air and land in Scarlett Johansson’s vagina, I still wouldn’t have landed in a better spot than Elliot. The best rookie back in the class will get to run behind arguable the league’s best line. Don’t forget, DeMarco Murray delivered 1,800 yards just two seasons ago behind this group of large men. If you have visions of drafting Elliot with a sneaky second round pick, you’re clearly more insane than a topless woman looking for respect while walking around the Puerto Rican day parade and you should be kicked out of the league.

C.J. PROSISE – SEAHAWKS Thomas Rawls is the projected starter in Seattle this year, based on his superior stats subbing in for the walking Skittles commercial, until he himself got injured. Yet, the fantasy landscape is littered with flash-in-the-pan running backs who have exploded in the back end of one season, only to disappear in the next (think Jerome Harrison and William Green).

Like seeing a photo of Rob Masterson in a thong, whoever drafts Rawls in round one, won’t be able to get that out of their head. Yet, is C.J. Prosise from Notre Dame the man to take advantage if Rawls falls? He’s a former wideout-turned-running back. He’s strong, like Calderon at an open tofu buffet, who ran a 4.48 forty, also like Calderon at an open tofu buffet. He’s either a guy who does nothing all season long or he’s the kind of guy who scores a 75-yard TD in week five, gets the starting nod as someone drops $75 to pick him up off the wire and by season’s end, we’re like, Rawls who?

TRAVIS HENRY – TITANS

Listed as the second best back in the draft, who stands about three feet over former Alabama and current Saints running back, Mark Ingram (look to the right), the Heisman Trophy winner was a solid candidate to be fantasy rookie of the year until the Titans took him. It’s a fantasy nightmare. It’s like the prom king going to the prom with the girl with down syndrome. Sure it’s a nice story, but in the end, there are no winners.

Now if I was one of the 34 Titans fans in existence, I’d be excited. This kid is a beast (I wanted the Cowboys to take Bosa in round one and Henry in round two). However, as a fantasy owner, you now can’t risk a top pick on him anymore. Tennessee already traded for DeMarco Murray, so at best it’s a share situation behind a suspect offensive line. Yes, there is potential, because maybe the Murray we saw last year is the true Murray. In that case, Henry could be this season’s 2014 Jeremy Hill, but that might be a tough sell.

KENYAN DRAKE – DOLPHINS With Lamar Miller gone, the starting job in South Beach should belong to Jay Ajayi. Yet, did this guy really do enough last year to prove that he’s about to become legit? He never came close to stealing carries from Lamar (never getting more than six carries in a game). Plus, we all know the Fins have wanted to bring in another back this offseason. They made an offer to C.J. Anderson (and lost out) and most recently, Arian Foster swung by for a visit, but left without a contract. Still, I wouldn’t be surprised if he or someone else eventually signs with Miami. If they don’t, that leaves room open for incoming third-round pick, Kenyan Drake.

Technically, Drake wasn’t even a starter in college, but that says more about the depth at Alabama. Yet, Drake isn’t a between the tackle guy so he’s probably at best a third-down back. Of course he could prove the doubters wrong if Ajayi falters or gets hurt and in the process making me look like a clueless dick. That wouldn’t be a first.

DEEP SLEEPERS

TYLER ERVIN – TEXANS He rushed for 1,600 yards as a senior for San Jose State, but Houston didn’t give Lamar Miller $26 million because of his charms and good looks. Oh and before you start saying, but Miller is old and he’ll breakdown…um, no. He’s just 25 years old.

KENNETH DIXON – RAVENS

In Baltimore, Javorius Allen is the popular pick to earn the starting job, but this is a team that still employs Justin Forsett, Terrance West and Lorenzo Taliaferro. They also have Trent Richardson, who appears to be losing weight like a model during bikini season. I could pull up a photo and show you the new lean and mean Richardson, but I rather show you a GIF of this chick.

Of course, among all those backs, none of those folks really stood out and Dixon, whose 87 career touchdowns are the second most ever scored in college football history, seems like a good fit for that offense. Note: I actually have no idea if he’s a good fit. I just said that because it makes me sound wicked smart when I do. I don’t call myself mini-Jay Glazer just because his head resembles my penis.

DEVONTAE BOOKER – BRONCOS I’m willing to bet Booker will be a popular sleeper pick come August. Yes, the Broncos’ backfield remains crowded with the same guys from the previous two seasons: C.J. Anderson and Ronnie Hillman. In fact, both re-signed with the team and are locked in long-term. However, did either of these guys do anything to impress you last year?

PAUL PERKINS – GIANTS We know this dude is getting drafted because the league is swimming with Giants fans. However, the G-Men’s backfield is as crowded as a Game of Thrones casting call. Rashard Jennings, Andre Williams, Shane Vereen and Darkwa Orleans all got touches last season. The team also brought in Bobby Rainey from Tampa because you can never truly have enough backs with a 3.6 yard per carry average. Now they draft this kid. Granted, none of those backs I named are any good, but is this rookie any better?

WENDELL SMALLWOOD – EAGLES I heard a lot of talk this offseason about Philadelphia wanting to draft a running back. In fact, I saw mocks that had them taking Elliot before they eventually traded up and gave up all their picks to do so, because apparantly you can never have enough high priced quarterbacks on your roster.

Anyhow, this tells me that maybe this coaching staff doesn’t have a lot of faith in Ryan Matthews or Darren Sproles. The new coach in Philly was the offensive coordinator for the Chiefs the past couple seasons, so Smallwood is getting compared to Jamaal Charles now, because in the NFL apples are oranges because six. Listen, he’s got Charles build, maybe even a little bigger, but even if he was the next Charles, remember, it took Jamaal a few seasons to breakout in Kansas City.